I am the One Who Ghosts is my latest music offering — it is actually the closing track to my forthcoming EP Outlaw the Dead.
The artwork is by Mario Noche.
The Spill Magazine premiered the song and writes:
"...one cannot help but slip into some kind of regal period jazz fantasyland ..."
When I started writing this one, I had in mind Walter White's infamous declaration "I am the one who knocks" from Breaking Bad. I thought this was an interesting, assertive approach from which to talk about the pattern of behavior we've come to describe as "ghosting."
Ghosting seems like something people are more likely to accuse others of doing or be flippant about when they do it themselves. Along the way the song became more confessional, and, as is my want, cynical.
The atmospheric instrumentation on this track is the result of that alchemy that develops between veteran musicians who have performed together many times and have created many records together as found with Kevin Seal, Christopher Fortier, and producer Chris McGrew. They have been playing together in various bands Bay Area since the mid 90s, including progressive punk band Griddle and psych rock outfit Seal Party. Fortier in particular is a tour-de-force here, providing some spectral David Glimor-esque riffs while Seal offers up a concise but soulful and bluesy piano solo.
The vocals are by Barcelona native Mar Vilaseca, who's smokey voice producer Chris McGrew heard when she was performing at the Black Cat jazz club in San Francisco. He thought she would be a good match for this track which he felt needed some "sang'n" to complement its sparse sonic landscape.
Mar is a classically trained vocalist, composer and multi-instrumentalist who studied at Juilliard under the tutelage of Wynton Marsalis, among others. Mar has performed at music festivals around the world and acclaimed jazz clubs such as Birdland Jazz Club, Jazz at Lincoln Center, and The Django Jazz Club.
I even threw together a lyric video composed entirely of stock footage I found on the Pexels website created by Mikhail Nilov — rarely does one find such a bounty of such perfectly suitable video.
Lyrics
Wish I’d made my escape
With the coming of the plague
It was the perfect opportunity
For me to exit this stage
And quietly slip away — for
I am the one who ghosts
A magician in a puff of smoke
The soldier who abandons his post
I am the one who ghosts
They’d been dating when he was still trying
To break into the local scene
Then he disappears 'til she spots him
On the cover of a magazine
Oh, I know his routine — for
I am the one who ghosts
That fog that burns off on the coast
The substance of our sworn oaths
I am the one who ghosts
As a child I was told I had a high threshold for pain
Emotions — they’ve always been a different thing
I get drawn into negative space
Can’t have a voice or a face
Stuck on rope bridge
Spanning a pitiless gorge
On one side the earth lies
Bitter and scorched
For the rest I’ve brought my torch — for
I am the one who ghosts
That word the gets lost in your throat
That last little bit of hope
I am the one who ghosts
I am the one who ghosts
A magician in a puff of smoke
The soldier who abandons his post
I am the one who ghosts